12 January, 2012

The Ice Cream Straw Man Cometh

The bad news in Israel keeps piling up. Religious tensions, Iran’s nuclear program and regional instability are all worrying enough – but now Häagen-Dazs ice cream in Israel is under threat, and may become a rarity on supermarket shelves.

Source

I don't really care about the article. Sure, I like Haagen Dazs, but not enough to cough up a car payment for a pint. Besides, I like homemade much better.

It's the mindlessness and vitriol of the commenting on this article that is simply astounding.

There's the dairyman who can't tell the difference between milks. Here's a hint, dairyman: only kosher milks coagulate into cheese. Oh yeah, and exactly how cost-effective is it to raise pigs on a dairy farm? Or do you think they would do it just to piss off the Jews?

There's the people who criticize the Rabbinate for not commenting on the Beit Shemesh, who can't do a simple Google search to find their condemnations from rabbinical organizations all over the world, including the Chief Rabbinate of Israel. This article is about ice cream. Go bang that drum somewhere else. And what about the reprisal attack in Ashkelon by a group of Ethiopian men? Did he deserve to get pummeled any more than the girl deserved to be spit on? Where's your outrage now, you sanctimonious assholes!

Then there's the kosher tax people. Really, that's about as anti-Semitic a comment as anything written in the Protocols of the Elders of Zion. I'm sure companies with lawyers, financiers and accountants much smarter than all of you would have figured out long ago whether paying a "kosher tax" for 1/10 of 1% of the population of the planet was really worth the cost. Or do you really believe that the Evil Joooz control the world?

Organized kashruth is about maintaining standards, and if you want to continue eating Haagen Dazs based on the OU's hashgacha, go right ahead; no one is infringing on your right to keep your own kashruth standards. Go ahead and eat your ice cream after shtupping your neighbor's wife in the back seat of your car on a Friday night. Have fun. The Chief Rabbinate is simply not willing to extend its supervision to stores that stock an item that relies on a kulah when it doesn't have to. Hey here's a thought Haagen Dazs people: open up a manufacturing facility here in Israel! OMG! Revolutionary! I mean, only Ben & Jerry's and Nestle's thought of it first, but you could, like, lower your costs of shipping and make even more money!

Funny, when it comes to meat I don't hear anyone complaining that the Rabbinate is more meikil about nikkur than R. Feinstein was. Hypocrites.